The Rock of Ages trailer is what we should show terrorists if waterboarding doesn’t work.
This photo may be Brad Pitt’s past, but it’s Shiloh’s future.
Shirt and all.
Well, probably minus the trophy.
Diamond or not, Angelina Jolie’s flat claw hand is so scary.
Blue Ivy wears jeans.
And you all thought she was going to be able to compete with me.
It’s taken me a few days to really come to terms with what I am about to show you.
After three panic attacks and one emergency session with my therapist, I am finally ready to admit that the following photograph exists in the universe, that it does not reflect on me, and that I now understand…
A bunch of celebrities have descended upon Paris this week. I’m jealous; like everyone else, I love Paris in the springtime – the weather, the new exhibits at the Musée d’Orsay, skipping the line at Louis Vuitton. But seriously?
Willow Smith, this outfit is why French people hate Americans. Parlez-vous FASHION?
Meanwhile, Charlize Theron chose to introduce her son Jackson to the paparazzi in Paris. Well-played, Theron. Well-played. It’s not a Telluride mountainside, but it’ll do.
As for Kristen Stewart — well, France, there’s really no good excuse for her. Sorry.
Look at this color-coordinated perfection from the senior members of the Beckham family. I would fit in so well with them. I’d match my outfits to theirs, and I wouldn’t even be embarrassed.
Instead I will just sadly drink coffee by myself.